Wednesday, May 7, 2014
What My Mother Taught Me
I used to wish my mother could teach me about art, music, and literature. Instead, she supported me in studying them from other teachers, at times in distant lands. What my mother did teach me, was how to love and I didn't realize it until much later when I outgrew self-centeredness, but she was patient with me. Apparently, her purpose in sharing this lesson was not immediate gratification.
When my mother, now elderly, recently moved from one care facility to another that could meet her growing needs, we heard from the staff at the first center. They told us how much they loved my mother and that did not surprise me because my mother is quite lovable. She has a twinkle in her eye and a good sense of humor. However, it gave me pause to hear them say that they were touched by how much love we gave our mother. They said that if they could give her a small percentage of what we gave her, they would be doing well.
My mother had eight children. We all love our mother and what's more, we all love each other, enjoy each other's company, and continue caring for my mother as her circumstances become more challenging. Really. I never thought that was a big deal, it was just how it was. That is until I heard from outside observers that no, that is not a given. My mom did something right to create that result.
What did she do? She valued relationships and thought it was her job to serve them and she taught us to do the same. When I would come home from college, she would ask, "Did you call your grandparents?". She would continue asking until I would eventually make the call and visit them and believe me, I cherish every memory I have of those remarkable people.
My mother taught us to value our family, our friends, our neighbors, our school communities and any other community we were a part of. We are in this together was her message and the glue that holds us together is love. So I learned about art, music, and literature on my own and my life is enriched by it, but I learned about love from my mother and my life is empowered by it.
Love is not a mere sentiment, it is a practice, one that fuels right action. That action dignifies our lives and those we meet. Thanks Mom.